Kitty Kat Conundrums: WHERE I'VE BEEN

I admit that I sort of abandoned this blog for a little while.

You see right after I posted that last one I packed myself a bag and flew my ass home for a week. See after a long long time of never being home I've really been taking advantage of the 2 hour flights home these past few months.

So I went home and kept meaning to write but, as happens when I'm home, I got drunk instead.

Oopsies.

So I'll give you the run down of my time back home:

tuesday - fly home. beerpong. run into Joey*
wednesday - chill all day. drink all night. get mosquito bite.
thursday - dad goes away leaving little ol' me with a house alone. sleep at Joey's.
friday - tanning. happy hour. dinner with friends. drinking drinking drinking. realize that my mosquito bite is like radioactive or something. fight with Joey.
saturday - taxi to the ER to deal with radioactive mosquito bite. Find out I am now a super hero**. Drink drink drink.
sunday - dad returns. just chill and pack.
monday - return to nyc.

* - so I astricked Joey's name because there are SO many details I need to share with you. Like why I only spent one night with Joey. And why my being a super hero clearly cramped his style.

So on tuesday when I ran into him there was this awkward "hey we've had sex mulitple times but I didn't tell you I was coming home" shuffle before I finally ballsed up and said hi. He nodded his head in acknowledgment and then left without saying anything. An hour after he disappeared (while I was on the losing side of a rousing game of beerpong) he texted me.

"helloo"

A soberly misspelled hello text from a past lover after he doesn't speak in person? Is this a booty call I detect?

Alas no. After we exchange hellos he goes silent. No booty call for me tonight. Which is fine because I already have my hands full making sweet beerpong shots and being fucking social.

So wednesday comes with no communication with the man I once spent many a naked night with. Instead I have a run in with a feisty mosquito. Now I have had many a skeeter bite in my day but this motherfucking really took a chunk out of me. (keep this little factoid in mind)

So thursday I take off from drinking. Just sort of chill out at home, went to see some friends and then ended up in a movie marathon. I get a reasonably early text from the boy. We make small talk, catch up a little bit and then he tells me he's going to bed. Owell.

Cut to 3 hours, a movie and half and a bowl of popcorn later and I get a follow up text. Something along the lines of "hey I'm awake lets have sex."

Usually that would be a turn off but since the sex in question is a guaranteed good time and only 3 minutes away I changed out of my sweatpants and hopped on my moped and went on my merry sexy way.
And we had fun. We always do. And like always Joey surprised me. I walk in and disrobe and then he just cuddles and chats for an hour before we have our grown up playtime. And afterwards we stayed up talking.. or in his case making me laugh with his overly tired nonsense rambling. He asks me to stay the night and I do but have to leave at 6 am before my usual round of morning sex.

Sad times.

So friday I expect more naked time. Especially considering that I have the whole house to myself. So I text him and he gives me some cavalier response about hanging out with a friend. NBD. I go to happy hour. Have some drinks and foodz. Then I text him at the next bar. To be fair to my dignity I did wait until my 3rd post dinner drink. He tells me he's still at a friends. So I go to the next bar.

And LO BEHOLD. In walks Joey.

Thanks for letting me know you were on your way Dbag.

Its crowded and I don't think he sees me so, giving him the undeserved benefit of the doubt, I grab his arm and say hi. He nods and keeps walking.

And doesn't come back.

An hour later when I can't seem to find him I text to ask where he's disappeared to...

"went home"

Clearly my only choice of levelheaded responses is "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??"

I'd like to state for the record that I was many drinks in by this point. I was already peeved that he hadn't kept in touch and I was of the opinion that it was clear that he'd be sleeping at mine that night. And then he LEAVES?! You're kidding me... So mad.

Now you remember that little bug bite I told you about? Well by this point it had spread to cover a very large part of my arm and my fingers were starting to go numb. Not exactly helpful to my mood. So now I'm pissed at Joey, my fingers are going numb and I feel like shit. I head home soon after. By the time I've sobered up at home alone my arm feels like it's going to explode and I'm crying on the phone to Lizz because I'm prety sure I'm dying.

Obviously.

Just as I'm reaching maximum freak out mode I get a text from Joey.

"u got trans?"

I shit you not that is a direct quote.

So I'm like... does he want me to come to him house now? after tonight? Fuck no. So I tell him I do but I'm not coming over. Oh wait... but he doesn't want me to drive 2 minutes to his house. Oh no. He wants me to drive to his friends house 20 minutes away to give him a ride to his car so that he can go home.

Wait, but wasn't he already at home? Nope. Nope.

So I tell him I can't come get him because I'm about to drive myself to the ER because I'm really sick. And do you want to know what his response is??

"Just not my night tonight"

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??

NOT YOUR NIGHT? I'M GOING TO THE FUCKING HOSPITAL.

I just about fucking lost my mind. And then I find out that I can't drive myself to the hospital and I lose my shit a little bit more. Needless to say my response pretty much ensures that I won't be having fun time with Joey anymore.

Sucks but owell. Maybe I'll find someone to settle down with. Or maybe I'll find a new funtime partner. Either way I'm sure I'll find a way to be happy :)

**oh and about that bite.... I maaaay have lied about the super power thing. Turns out it was a bacterial infection. Gnarly right? Pics for proof ->