NOSEBLEEDS AND PUBLIC URINATION

SO tonight me and MugWug went out with a couple of his LaX buddies (that's a pretentious way to say Lacrosse.. get it? La- Cross = Lax.)

It was super fun and we drank and danced and despite this being the only day in my life where I didn't have make up in my purse I still had a good time despite not planning to go out...and therefore not being appropriately made up or dressed up.

First just me and MugWug went to get some Korean food... mmmmm my favorite fucking thing ever (seriously if you ever piss me off just take me for bibimbop and we'll be cool) and had dinner and  two glasses of water.

Then we go to see a movie (Kings Speech... if you haven't seen it, go. I loved it so hard we could have made a baby) and I had a soda.  Which, while being a "small", filled me up to the brim.

Then we decide to go to a bar to meet his friends.  Introductions and 1 heineken.

Then the bar sort of dies so we move to another... more introductions, run into an old friend and three Heinekens, 1 shot and a glass of water.

Do you see what's happening?

Lots of liquid and no bathroom breaks...

So at 4am... after being out for almost twelve hours I was in a cab on my way home and I was dyiiiiing.  I needed to pee so bad that 4 blocks from my apartment I almost asked the cabbie to pull over so I could pop a squat.

But this is not such a brilliant idea you see, because, I live off of Times fucking Square.  Just as I had made my mind up to not suffer and just stop and pee over a subway grate or in the corner between the wall and the entrance to Starbucks a fucking cop car went past me and I remembered that public urination was sort of a no-no here.

And then I have a little gander around and I notice TWELVE OTHER COP CARS.

Of course... this is Times Square after all.

And as an international member of society I really don't  need the cops taking an interest in my actions so.... I sucked it up and stayed in the car.

Got home and peed so hard I thought my bladder would fall out and just when I thought the worst was over I decided to make a snack of granola and blueberries and milk.  Mix in a bowl and bring to my room.

Go to take a bite and notice the milk is sort of pink... as I look closer.. drip drop, a little red dot appears in the milk.  Wipe my hand under my nose and lo and behold... a nose bleed.

Shocker.

So now I have vaseline up my nose (I hear it helps stop bleeding and keep passages moist) pink milk and  a tired body. I think I'll sleep now and pray that this vaseline works and I don't wake up in a pool of my own blood again.

Night kittens.
xxKK