Friday, July 2, 2010

SHEER PAISLEY MAKES ME WANT TO JUMP OUT A WINDOW

So I've been privy to several complaints that I'm not writing often enough... which is both flattering and annoying. I keep trying to sneak on at work to post but I get distracted by various things... my stapler being out of staples, refilling my coffee mug, devising new covert routes to the vending machine, googling at the jailbait interns, dressing up the office chia pet with outfits made from my supplies & unscrewing the wheels from my co-workers chairs... oh.. and doing my job sometimes... so clearly the blog gets shafted.

I know its not fair... I'm thinking that maybe this weekend I'll write up a bunch of my ideas (I promise I have them!) and save them so when I'm in a bind I can just pop one up... it feels like cheating but it's not.

Anyways.

So today I came to work in my usual garb of "whatever was clean and within grabbing distance of my bed this morning" which, since I am from NY and 97.4% of my wardrobe is black, was an almost all black ensemble.

Well some little snarky snot nosed brit gets into the elevator this morning and asked me if I was in mourning before bursting into laughter...

firstly... its not that funny, stop cackling you fugly mismatched bitch
secondly...how horrible would you feel if I said yes? Like that would have been really good payback. "are you in mourning hahahahha" "yes... my twin sister was brutally murdered last night. I'm paying my respects." "oops."

oops is right you dumb bitch.

and lastly like.. what a moronic comment. clearly I'm not in mourning... I'm rockin some sexy Jessica Simpson hooker heels and super hot coral nail polish... what person in mourning has the energy to spend on perfectly balancing all day long or on finding the perfect nail color for their skin tone? huh?

So try to stop laughing at your own jokes and go crawl back up Kmarts butt since thats obviously where you bought your paisley sheer blouse and blue striped ankle length skirt...

yes... blue striped skirt that went to her ankles and a paisley sheer blouse... I shudder at the memory.

My skinny black pant and off the shoulder black AA top will be in fashion forever... your look will never.



Okay now that that rant is out of the way... because I didnt post yesterday I will be posting again this afternoon/tonight so keep an eyeball out for it.

lotsa love,
Mama Kat

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